teaRs,Idle tears

January 22, 2007

tears,idle tears,I know not wAt dey meaN,

tears from dA depth of sOme divine despair

rise in the heart, and gather to the eyes

in loOking on the happy aUtumn fields,

and thinking of the dayz that are nO mOre.

 

fresh as the first beam glittering on a sail,

that brings oUr friends uP frOm the uNderwOrld,

sad as the last which redden oVer One

dat siNkz with oL we lOve beloW the verGe

sO sad,sO fresH, the dAys daT aRE no MoRE.

 

aH,sad and strange as in daRk sUmmer dawNs

the earliest pipe of half-awakened birds

to dYing ears,wHen unto dYing eyes

the casement slowly gRows a gLimmering sQuare,

sO saD,sO strange, the daYs that are nO ,mOre.

 

dear as remembered kisses after deAth,

aNd sweet as thOse bY hOpeLess fAncy feigned

oN lips that are fOr otheRS,Deep as lOve,

dEep as first lOve, and wild with oL regret

O death in life,the days dat are nO mOre.

aKing aMa

January 16, 2007

sandali lamang tayong nagkasama

dahil ikaw ay maagang namayapa,

ngunit ang salitang ama sa aking puso’t isipan

ay hindi mawawala magpakailan pa man.

 

hanggang ngayon ako pari’y nasasabik

magkaroon ng amang napakabait

mayakap man lang kahit isang saglit

para maghilum ang aking pananabik.

 

alam kong ika’y nasa maayos na kalagayan

kasama ang puong maykapal na makapangyarihan

pati na rin ang iyong kabiyak sa buhay

na aking inang mahal kong tunay

 

ito na nga cGuro ang aking kapalaran 

ang maagang mawalan ng minamahal sa buhay,

kya ngayo’y akoy nangungulila

sa aking mga magulang mahal kong lubusan. 

"aKing Ina"

January 15, 2007

 naNg ako'y bata pa

ikaw lagi ang aking kasama,

nang si ama ay namatay,

ikaw pa rin ang aking karamay.

 

nOong una ako'y humiling..

sana ikaw ay laging makapiling

hindi magkasakit o mamamatay,

para ako'y hindi na malulumbay.

 

dininig ng Diyos ang aking hiling

ngunit ito'y panandalian lamanG

ika'y namatay at inilibing

ako'y naiwang buhay at luhaan.

 

dahil sa iyong pagkawala'y labis na nasaktan..

iyak dito,iyak doon, iyak kahit saan..

hindi na nakikita ang matamis kong ngiti

na noo'y nakikita sa aking mga labi.

 

sa pagdaan ng panahon..

unti-unting nawawala

ang aking pangungulila

ngunit sakit sa aking puso'y di pa rin naglaon..

 

hindi ko masasabi na ika'y aking makakalimutan

dahil ikaw ay laging nasa aking puso't isipan

nasaan ka man ako'y masaya

dahil ikaw ang " aking INA!"

nObody loVes me..

January 13, 2007

nObody loves me!!!..

cOz f dey loved me..dey wOn't hurt me like diz..

i wanna die!..i juz can't imagine dat my life wUd be miserable because of the pipol hUrting me!..

i don't know wat'z within me dat makes dem too agresiv to hUrt me diZ way!

i hate dEm!

dey already kNow dat im weak….yet dey still hUrting me! 

im a loner..

diZ blog of mine iz like a diary dat i can spread out aL my hartaches and happenings n my life everyday.. i dON'T care aBout wat the readers say bWt me..8'z up 2 dem to juDge wat'z on deir mind wen it comes 2 me..

 

iM a loNer..

im stubOrn..

 im insane..

im burden for d pipol wHom i trusted and i loVed..

im a hater!!

im a hater to dOz pipol wHo hurt  me and to doZ hU hated me and always makes me cry!!..

teArs….

January 12, 2007

miSeraBle life!.. 

dUnno wat 2 do…!

January 11, 2007

i nver thought that the one i lean on is the oNe wHo will makes me feel doWn!..

i cried to mucH because of the pain i haVe ryt Now and i dOn't Know wat to do!

diz iz not d life dat iM lOoking fOr!..

i hate it!..

damN! 

wHy??

January 10, 2007

Why ?

 

When I look into the sky

I saw a crying eyes..

As I look into the other side

Oh! It’s me crying and asking why?

 

Am I born to be happy?

Or born to be unlucky?

Why is this happening to me?

What’s the matter with me?

 

Life is so unfair!

I feel like I am floating in the air

That every time my life is in riddle

Seems I’m somewhere in the middle.

 

As I walk through the passage of living

I noticed that half of me is missing

And that is being got into an accident at all times

Which I, myself don’t know the reason why?

 

 

 

 

I’m careful in everything I do

But misfortune comes accidentally

That hurts me so badly

And I don’t know what to do.

 

I feel like I’m hanging

And I can’t stop myself from crying

Why is it always like this?

Could it be enough for this?

 

Because of that happenings

I ask myself and ask God

Am I really that special to feel these things?

To suffer many times and still asking “ why ?”.